Note to Seattle: A little salt goes a long way

An open letter to Seattle:

Hello again. I know it has been a while since we’ve spoken, and that has probably been in the best interests of both of us, but I’m afraid something really needs to be said.

Certainly you have noticed the foot or so of snow piled up in every nook and cranny of this city. It looks beautiful and gave us all a few days off, but I think it might be time to do something about it, after all, those 3 or 4 inches of choppy ice on every road except the highways makes traversing your hills and dales even more difficult than usual.

Especially when the general nitwittancy and inexperience in snow of Seattle drivers is factored in.

I know that generally speaking, you never see this much snow. I’ve read that you usually only get about eight days a year that are below freezing and I know that this is the longest it’s been this cold since 1990, which is pre-”Nevermind” it is so long ago.

With that in mind, I generally forgive the lack of snow plows and enjoy the idea that 3 inches of snow will shut down the whole region.

(Except the Seahawks, who somehow seem to play better when it snows.)

But as the snow and ice piled up day after day, the state road crews have done a masterful job keeping the highways clear enough for travel, but the city has, well, essentially ignored the problem.

That’s because in Seattle, the snow-removal plan is basically “It has to melt eventually, right?”

The city actually tries to compact the snow and ice to make roads passable for four-wheel drive or chained vehicles. Everyone else is on their own!

But all of this can be fixed with one simple word, Seattle: Salt.

Salt. Sodium Chloride. One of our oldest and most precious commodities. It not only preserves our food and enhances our pretzels, it also is a proven ice-buster.

Salt works by lowering the freezing point of water, meaning the salt-infested snow and ice melts easier, leaving roadways much more passable.

We’ve been doing it on the East Coast for, well, ever. Yeah, we get a lot more snow and ice and yeah, it eats away our cars, but it certainly makes it so we can get to work if need be.

And it also allows us to laugh at the smaller amounts of snow that closes you down. (Though, admittedly, this last storm would have been a big one anywhere. A foot of snow is no joke no matter where you live.)

But Seattle, you avoid salt like a fat guy with hypertension. You say it is for environmental reasons, but I just don’t get it.

I know that much of your runoff heads down the hill and into the Sound, but I also thought that was a saltwater environment to begin with. Once it is diluted with the snow it melts, the effects of salt on the Sound would be negligible.

Especially the one time each year it is needed.

I know it may be tough to believe, but back home we have nature too and despite using salt on our roads every winter, it comes back green every spring.

Instead, Seattle, you have dumped more than 6,000 tons of sand on your roads to try and provide some grip for spinning tires and slippery shoes.

But it seems to me that the sand is just as bad, if not worse for the environment. After all, for every construction project, silt fences must be erected to protect the streams and water supplies – as well as the sewer systems – from clogging with sand and dirt and suffocating wild life.

Meanwhile, you are mixing 6,000 tons of the stuff with two feet of snow and letting it wash into everything.

That seems like an odd choice.

I mean, why not use the salt? That way, at least the environmental impacts can be balanced against the ROADS BEING CLEAR, instead of JUST the environmental impacts of sand.

Who knows, maybe if the city put salt down, the ice and snow on Capital Hill would have melted some so when those brave but nitwitted busdrivers (especially the second one, who watched the first) turned down East Thomas Street and slid right through the guardrail, almost dumping their kids onto I-5, they could have stopped instead.

Just a thought.

The state DOT uses salt, and have you noticed that the highways are the only truly clear roads in the entire region?

Think there’s a correlation?

Anyway, Seattle, I hope you are well and I hope that all that sand doesn’t clog your sewers too bad when the rains return.

Because we are going to have a LOT of water to deal with in the next few weeks and the last thing we need is 6,000 tons of sand getting in the way.

Always,

Brian

PS – I’m serious about the Seahawks. We should pump in snow every game….